ostracized(pg 203): to exclude, by general consent, from society, friendship, conversation, privileges, etc.
hypervigilance (pg 242): the condition of maintaining an abnormal awareness of environmental stimuli, post-traumatic stress syndrome, marked by symptoms like frequent nightmares and repetitive anxiety dreams, insomnia, intrusive disturbing thoughts.
A theme that is developing in the memoir is when you feel something is the right thing to do, follow your heart.
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